I am not ashamed to say that I bought season tickets for the New Jersey Nets. What else is there to do in Newark; especially when the snow is up to your eyeballs for four months.
Faithfully, I have endured it all at these games other than the frequently nosebleeds from being 3 rows from the top.
- Embarrassing Astronomical Ass Whoopings
- Witnessing the team lose their self-esteem by the third quarter
- LeBron making them smell his nuts
- The crowd consisting of more fans from the opposing team (Okay, I'm guilty of this one too, I represented when the Lakers came to town)
- $13 Heinkens for Mr. EcoSoul
- $6 slice of cheese pizza for me
- Effed up security
- Ushers who think they are security, especially the old ladies and that tall chubby guy with the dreadlocks (idiots)
- Shitty "Meet the Team" Event @ Robert Treat Hotel. Tragedy.
- Horrible trades, please get Sasha Vujacic out of there
- My cringing everytime Brook Lopez goes to the paint and looks like an awkward giraffe
- Oh yes, and if I hear the song "Carwash" one more time, I will vomit some platform shoes
And then Jay Z meets up with Kentucky Wildcat's in Final Four resulting in the Nets getting fined 50k. Being a minority partner, Jay Z is forbidden to interact with the team in that capacity because it seems as if he is recruiting.
Damn, dude, I know you are itching to get to Brooklyn, but the team really needed that money. Why don't you do a concert for them, or have Beyonce bounce around with that 10 pound weave. Or perhaps, have Kim Kardashian give massages to the starting team.
Or go up the street to the basketball courts off of Springfield Avenue by the projects and give five guys $10 for three weeks of play. I guarantee you will get your money's worth.
But dagg, Jay, no bueno.