Remembering Who I Am in the Chaos

One of the things that detests me the most about this country is how quickly a black person's character, credibility and accomplishments can be stomped at the drop of dime when they simply act human. No, not superhuman, as the high achieving ones are supposed to act, but plainly human and show emotion, or show passion, or show that gut-bucket black side that often has other folk grabbing their laptops, purses and 401k's saying OMG.

This environment makes black folk feel like they have to do so much self-examination that we are even checking our daily stool to make sure it isn't too black, meaning too controversial and too boisterous for a nigger.

I have this thing about apologies and saying sorry, especially during the "era of transparency." It seems like the only people who are being seared up against the wall of "public decency" are those who have historically been underrepresented and underpriveleged.

On the other hand, the Joe Wilson's of the world can give a stiff apology then say "fuck you" I'm not apologizing anymore, even to the president. But Serena, Kanye, and Obama will be kissing ass and bowing down until the cows come home.

Serena
So let me start with Serena. If nobody else understands you I DO. Shove that ball down, curse, scream and yell. You were gonna blow up anyway, and the bogus call was the camel that broke the straw's back.

When I was an entertainment editor for a black newspaper in Los Angeles, the sports editor, who was also a sister, would give me blow-by-blow horrid details of hostile, racist crowds who would terrorize Venus and Serena Williams when the entered the scene. Not only were their jeers, but taunts such as "monkey" and making obsene noises as they served. This was in the US, as well as abroad. And what did Serena and her sister do, played gracefully and took names on the court.

Ironically, the media never highlighted the disgusting behaviors of the "high-culture" mostly white crowds whose sentiements were "anything, but the black girls must win." But what the media did focus on were things like Venus and Serena's braided and beaded hair and the insinuation that the war cries they made resembled animalistic grunts.

Then Serena became a poster child for the white man's obsession with black female bodies. No one every highlighted that in her memoirs, the constant spector and spectacle of her body contributed to her body insecurites. As well, when her half-sister, Yetunde Price, was murdered she dipped into a deep grieving period where she did not play, but mourned, causing weight gain that emphasized her already curvaceously defined body.

Sports photo after photo focused on her buttocks and highlighted its abundance with what we call "butt shots"; thus emulating the sad and widely unknown story of Saarjtie Baartman, or the Hottentot Venus who was sexually exploited and subjected to public displays throughout England and France in the 1800s because of her voluminous glutteous maximus.

In response, Serena attempted to glamorize her body which was not only unique in skin tone, but in curves. Far from skinny, white and flat, Serena attemped to fashionable show her body aesthetic until one day, the passive tennis conquerer said to reporters, "I don't have a flat ass!"

Then on this day, where the pressure was mounting, after a decade of being one of the two people who brought generations of "others" to the sport of tennis, snapped and said "Fuck" and "Fuck YOU".

After the storm of tsks-tsks, that were reserved for criticisms of proper and appropriate behavior for Negroes in non-traditional negro sports, Serena is tap-dancing and attempting to save her reputation in the sport.

If only Serena were John McEnroe , maybe her outburse could turn into lucrative sports endorsements and camera commercials, even appearances on Jackass-type movies with Adam Sandler. Her anger would be her bread-and-butter, but noooooo, she's a negresse and must be kept in her place.

Kanye
Okay, let's be real. This publicity stunt wasn't anything usual for Kanye. He is known for his outburst, but my question is, what made it such a "no-no" this time. This was the fucking VMAs who gives a shit.

MTV didn't want black people on its show anyway in the beginning. The channel didn't even want to play Michael Jackson until his label threatened to boycott the "rock only" channel for white teens in the 80s.

It certainly did not want hip-hop artists, until they saw how much money was being made off of them. Now, most of their format revolves around hip-hop and its offshoots. Dammit, half of the music industry is interwoven with hip hop.

So why fuck with Kanye?

Do I dare say that Missy Ann was the issue. Hell yes. An innocent, lily teen who was brutally treated, now has to be defended.

I guess Kanye can challenge, Bush with his "Bush doesn't like black people," but he cannot shake up Missy Ann.

Is he an asshole? Uhhhh. he was an arrogant asshole before the VMAs. Hell, he was raised to smell and feel himself, that's how he got to this point, and frankly that's how one stays poignant in a vain and shallow industry.

This time, I don't care about a right or wrong. What pisses me off is that a brother who boldly challenged the president and has nutsacks longer than most is being cornered and forced to apologize for disturbing the system, the racist, economic, and classist monopoly that MTV has on the music industry.

What's even more upsetting, is that Kanye and Serena prove that Misbehaving Niggers are Not Allowed.

I am posting this video because Malcolm X lets me know that I am not crazy.
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